long time no blog
For a while now I’ve been a little MIA on here (my deepest apologies). So it’s time we catch up!
Since you last heard from me,
I’ve been to 11 different countries,
slept on multiple kinds of beds,
seen places I’ve only dreamt about,
and discovered parts of myself I didn’t realize were hiding.
I like tomatoes now
and I’m learning to love the skin I’m in.
I wake up before noon
and sometimes drink regular milk in my coffee.
I’ve developed a new love for people
and can cry in front of friends now.
I talk to strangers at the airport
and create small talk with whoever’s sitting next to me.
I take time to read my Bible instead of my phone every morning
and take notice of what kind of birds chirp outside my window.
So much has changed, yet I feel like everything’s remained the same.
I’ve also learned a lot since the last time we talked.
I’ve learned that warm showers are a blessing
and that sweatshirts can make a nice pillow.
I’ve learned a smile can go a long way
and listening is the greatest form of love.
I’ve memorized the laughs and coffee orders of the people I love.
I’ve learned to find beauty and peace wherever my feet go.
In case you didn’t know I did a 6-month long discipleship training school with Circuit Riders. What that entailed was a 3-month lecture phase in California - learning and living in community, and then a 3-month outreach. My outreach was to Western Europe. There were 14 of us total and we took 2 little vans all around to countries like France, Germany, Italy, Switzerland, and so many others. We held worship gatherings and got to share the gospel in multiple different cities. I think my favorite part had to be the people we got to minister to. Watching people of all ages and cultures encounter the Lord, some even for the first time was so special. I got to experience the goodness of the Lord in a whole new way. I learned what living in true friendship with Jesus looks like and my heart will never be the same.
God simply flipped my heart upside down and I couldn’t imagine going back to the life I was living before.
While I was traveling I tried a lot to live in the present moment. I’d say that went pretty well except near the end of my 2 1/2 months away. I was a couple of weeks out from going home and I couldn’t stop myself from thinking about what my next move was. Everyone around me seemed to have plans when they got back home. Plans to move, to go to school, to start new jobs - everyone had something, and every plan I tried to make, seemed to fail.
I also thought I had plans to move. My heart was set on moving somewhere after I got back from Europe. I thought I was going to move to a new place and step into a new fun little chapter of life. You can assume how that ended - since I’m sitting on my bedroom floor writing this entry.
I asked the Lord where I should go next and I spun a globe. I closed my eyes and waited for the globe to stop spinning.
My finger landed on Michigan. Ironic.
Since I’ve been back in Michigan I’ve felt a new appreciation for home.
I’ve been starting to notice the way the sun changes the color of my walls based on what time of day it is.
I no longer reach for my phone when I’m sitting in the passenger seat because suddenly the grass is so green and the leaves are so vibrant.
It feels easier to laugh and I feel peace when I cry.
I see the Lord in every detail of my life now.
He’s all around.
The Lord has simply helped me see the beauty in everything. Looking back, I feel like I was missing what the Lord had for me in specific moments because I was too focused on what was next.
Instead of running, fighting to find the next best thing - I had to sit and ask the Lord to reveal Himself.
I had to abide and trust that in every detail, He was present.
I think that’s why I tried so desperately to move.
I was afraid the Lord wouldn’t meet me exactly where I was.
I doubted where He had me.
Maybe some of you reading this feel the same way that I did. You doubt where you’re at and think you need to run somewhere else to feel better.
The minute I surrendered all of my plans for the Lord’s, was the minute I began to recognize all the blessings surrounding me. The Lord has truly met me more these past couple of months than I’ve ever experienced in my life.
He is so present and He is so near.
I learned that my plans didn’t work because He wanted me to spend this time with Him.
He wanted my undivided attention, just as much as I wanted His.
That was it for my first entry back! (Sorry if it was all over the place) I have so much I want to share with you guys from these past couple of months in Europe and at home. It’s been such a time of growth and I finally feel ready to write again which is amazing. I’ve been in a writing slump - I felt like I couldn’t find words to describe how I was feeling but now writing is fun again. I filmed my entire time in Europe, so I’ve been posting videos on my YouTube but writing feels more personal sometimes! I’m excited to get vulnerable and really take you into my journal these next couple of entries! Thank you for being patient and sticking around. Your support means the world to me. Writing has always been a hidden little passion of mine. I love sharing experiences via writing! If you read this far DM me on the blog insta and tell me a little about what God is doing in your life right now. Alright, talk soon (I promise this time) LOVE YA!
xoxo, Mere
