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I’m Meredith Good.
I’m 22 years old (as of today)
And this is my blog.
Anyone who knows me knows that my journals are VERY precious to me. I’ve gone through 6 journals in total since my freshman year of high school. I’ve filled them with my favorite memories, high school crushes, and the unnecessary thoughts that cloud my brain. My journals are for my eyes, and my eyes only. I’ve never let ANYONE read, let alone touch them. They’re private. They're personal. They’re secret.
One day DECEMBER 29TH 2020 at 12:44 AM I wrote my very first digital journal entry. I wrote it with the thought that someday it might go somewhere. I wrote with the intention of being heard and that maybe someone other than my future self might read it. And I guess I was right.
So
here it is.
Unedited and straight from Google Docs.
Oh, and for reference, this is me in December 2020:
Cringe.
Anyways… let’s see what 20-year-old Mere had to say.
December 29th, 2020 12:44 am
I have not one clue what this is going to be or why I’m even typing this out in the first place. It’s mainly because I'm becoming too lazy to write in a journal and typing is actually quite enjoyable for me. Who knows maybe someday this will be one big fat book with my face on it.
My name is Meredith Good, some call me Mere, others call me Merebear - but I hate when people call me that. I’m currently a fresh 20-year-old, living happily at home with my mom, dad, brother, and precious not-so-little golden doodle Maizy. I actually strongly dislike writing so it’s really shocking that I’m taking time out of my day to write something...so unlike me. But I’m too lazy to write in my journal because my hand gets all cramped up, so I decided to type in google docs. Hopefully, I’ll write more here than I did in my journal. Oh another thing about me is yes, I am in college. I’m a sophomore attending a local community college in my town. So now that you know a little more about the basics of me let’s get back into my first-ever digital diary entry.
So today I was in the car driving to my friend's house when all of a sudden I had this big, powerful, random realization hit me. It’s MY life. Yeah okay sounds like a pretty basic idea, like yeah Mere? It is your life? Where are you going with this? And to be fair, I probably should have realized this way sooner, but there’s more. Just stick with me. I realized I’m now at the age where I can chase after my dreams and work towards my passions. The world is huge and the possibilities are endless. A little goldfish in the deep sea.
Sometimes (at least for me) I just expect God to do the work. I expect Him to present everything to me right at my front door on a silver plate with my name on it. I just expect to sit there while God does all the heavy lifting. Then I get mad when things “aren't going well” or I have “bad luck” (hence why do bad things happen to good people). BUT HERE’S THE THING. God WANTS you to take the first step. He wants YOU to get up and step out of the boat. He wants you to listen and obey Him. How can you expect to see God working in your life when you’re still sitting in the boat? Throughout my short life so far, I can easily look back and see how God’s plan has worked out perfectly. Most of these “good luck” moments are actually just moments where I put my trust in God and took the first step of faith. This upcoming new year I plan to continuously take the leap of faith, not only for God but for myself and I suggest that you do too (you meaning myself because I’m the only one who will ever see this). All it takes is one step. Sometimes it can get scary trying to figure out where to go, or what to do but God only asks you to take one step at a time.
I'm now at that exciting age where I get to start creating and living out the things I've dreamed about doing since I was a kid. I get to choose where I go, what I do, how I spend my time, or who my energy goes into. I no longer have to put up with people who constantly treat me less than what I'm worth. I get to make little Mere proud.
So future mere, stop sitting around and waiting for these dreams to just magically happen. Take one step and watch how things start to fall into place. God wants you to seek Him and work towards Him. He wants you to need Him and He wants you to take a step of faith. Have faith and believe that if you take that small step, He will catch you and guide you step after step. He’s not going to leave you in the water to sink. He’s going to lift you up and take you to places you could have never imagined.
This is advice to myself as I enter the new year. This is the year of dreams becoming a reality. All I have to do is step out of the boat and take one small step after the other.
PRESENT DAY:
The fact that this was my first little digital journal entry 2 years ago is kind of crazy. This message couldn't have been more perfect for me (and hopefully you too). Starting a blog and letting people in my mind is intimidating. It’s vulnerable. The thought of people seeing my words on their screens and reading things I’ve never shared before is wild. It’s new, exciting, and honestly something I never imagined doing. Little Mere would be FREAKING OUT that her journals are not only being read but put on the internet.
So. This is me.
Stepping out of the boat.
One baby step at a time.
My past 20-year-old self basically just called me out. There’s no going back now.
This is just one of my many, many journal entries.
From deep moments with God, to boys and ice cream dates - my diary has heard it all, and trust me, she’s been dying to share.
Welcome to my not-so-secret journal.
This is as good as it gets.
Enjoy.
